Become a Spy for Specsucks and Find Purpose in Life

As the fall season rolls around, your opportunities to contribute to society in a meaningful way expand.  Here at Specsucks, we are preparing for a second year of groundbreaking and definitive campus news coverage.  After a summer away from the spec, things have become clearer.  Our main focus is of course the Spectator, a newspaper which has failed us both materially and morally.  But do not think we are narrow minded, zealous, or otherwise dogmatic.  Over the summer, the absence of the spec has provided me with an opportunity for sapient thoughts.  I can see now that we can cover the most broadest of topics about how the spec sucks.  For example, we can cover how their news paper sucks, how their magazine sucks, how their articles suck, etc, etc. Of course, preambulatory to this expansion is the concomitant expansion of the ranks of the Specsucks staff.  This is why this fall we are actively recruiting from the student body, especially the freshman class.

To those of you who are not considering joining Specsucks, please abate your nonconsideration for a short while, and consider this:  Working for Specsucks does not exclude you from other activities.  In fact, we actively encourage our members to infiltrate the spec and Bwog.  Thus, you are not forced to make a choice between working for Specsucks and working for the spec, but you are given a choice between working for the spec, and working for the spec plus being a super secret spy agent for specsucks.  To any of you who know basic game theory, you will recognize that the second option strictly dominates the first, similarly to how Specsucks dominates the spec.  And especially to freshman who are weighing their options, consider that by spying for the spec, not only will you be super cool, but you will also be in good company:  We already have one confirmed one informant in the incoming class, and we are tentatively having talks with a second.

Do what is right.  Do what is cool.  Join Specsucks, the only true secret society left at Columbia.  Contact us at the official specsucks email address: thecloakedmask@gmail.com

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7 Responses to “Become a Spy for Specsucks and Find Purpose in Life”

  1. Leroy Jenkins Says:

    I once thought there was nothing more regrettable then the first time I picked up a copy of the spectator. Soon after this I found light. I found what it means to be a part of something. SpecSucks has come a long way and I am proud to be a part of the fastest growing organization at Columbia.

  2. Goddamn specsucks, I have so much respect for you.

  3. Anonymous Says:

    i want to do this. how do we get in touch w you? no contact info.

  4. LOL dn't be dumb Says:

    you are being like a specster by doing one thing without thinking over it all the way. I cannot talk to you about my connections and clever intentions without knowing where to send an email or a sms text message. LOL so post that and then we’ll talk about it all.

  5. Heya i am for the first time here. I came across this board
    and I find It truly useful & it helped me out much. I hope to give something back and aid others like you aided me.

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