Archive for October, 2012

so much for being a news PAPER

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , on October 29, 2012 by specsucks

hey to all my readers well spec is dumb
they just announced that they are no longer printing their news paper any more only tomorrow but they are still writing stuff online.  well we already know you lied about being daily and we already know you lied about being news but i thought i could always rely on you being paper like paper you can hold and wipe your buttox or burn.  what now i guess they are a blog you are not a blog spec.  i do not want to read spec.  if i wanted to read a bad blog, i would read bwog.
EDITORS NOTE:

some of the comments in this article may be construed to be insulting bwog which has indorsed us that is not the case we are simply stating a fact and we still support bwog in their fight against the spec at least as long as they indorse specsucks

In chaos of storm, vigilante justice against the spec reigns supreme

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , on October 29, 2012 by specsucks

a tipster has tipped us that at the entrance to several residence halls the spec has been scattered across the ground and trampled underfoot we are not sure if this is the act of an individual who took the matter into his own hands under the cover of the storm or if the winds just nocked them over but either way we are happy.

Hurricane at columbia

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , on October 28, 2012 by specsucks

hey to all my readers there is going to be a hurricane at columbia university.  University officals say that they do not expect any of the larger buildings to come down in the storm, so we should be safe in the tunnels.
p.s. the spec office should be totally safe you should not leave there in fact you could even throw a hurricane party there so stay in the spec building during the hurricane

uugghhh dumb spec writing is so dumb

Posted in Uncategorized on October 27, 2012 by specsucks

I accidentally read the spec today and it is the worst thing ever.  There was one article which stood out to me about how dumb it was about a mexican restaurant.  Like really spec, now you are reviewing mexican restaurants.  And the writing is terrible, so it’s like a one two punch of badness, and in the ring of good taste, I’m on the ropes.

First, let’s start with the premise of this article

Local Mexican restaurant Papasito suffered a major blow in its ongoing feud with community members this month

A major feud huh?  This seems like it might be something interesting.  Maybe there are angry riots about it!  So, what does the owner of the place have to say about this angry feud?  maybe that the community should burn in hell?  That he doesn’t give two shits what the community has to say about him?

“Local neighbors have congratulated us…”, [the manager at Papasito] added

Yes.  Seriously.  You can’t make this up.  Spec is running articles about a feud…in which the two parties are congratulating each other.  Talk about yellow journalism…

Oh, but what’s this, spec says

has been the subject of seemingly constant complaints over the past year

Wow, so that’s constant complains. or, wait. no.  it’s not.  because you see, “constant complains” would mean that there were complaints coming throughout the entire year.  No no no, that’s not what the spec is talking about here.  They’re talking about “seemingly” constant complaints, i.e. “hey i m a specster and i don’t really know much about this so it seems constant to me!”.  Because what are those complaints that the spec has?

ranging from concerns over the rowdy behavior of its evening customers to violations for serving underage drinkers

Okay well first of all, that is only two complaints, and second of all, it seems that people are complaining… about it being a bar.  so your telling me that people get rowdy when they are drunk? tell me more! there is a bar near columbia serving underage people? hold the presses! Call the police!

so what’s the big deal?

But according to CB7 chair Mark Diller, it’s not clear whether the company that holds the restaurant’s liquor license is actually operating the business.

ooh, that might be interesting.  does the same company that owns the liquor license operate the business? it’s not clear! nobody knows! let’s read the next sentence

A company called Tokyo Pop LLC holds the liquor license, even though a different company, Papasito Midtown Corporation, operates the restaurant, Diller said,

Whoah! this guy knows the answer!  it’s “no”! but I thought it was unclear? He should tell the first guy you interviewed, because clearly that first guy was unclear about it, but this guy, this guy has all the facts!  So wait, who was that first guy again? Mark Diller? what.  seriously spec.

You’re just doing a bang up job quoting this guy, aren’t you.  How about some more quotes from him

Diller acknowledged that the lack of a liquor license might force Papasito to close.

Yup, you heard it straight from the source.  Apparently taking away the liquor license from an agave bar will force it to close!  you really are making this guy look like an einsten here.  Well, that’s not the limit of spec’s quoting abilities

“It’s a family-oriented neighborhood, so if there are fights, then they shouldn’t have their license,” Upper West Side resident Morgan Theves said. “People only go there to drink, that’s the bottom line—which is fine, but if they can’t control them,” they shouldn’t be serving alcohol, he said.

Did you notice that?  on first read , it seems Morgan Theves said that if they can’t control people, then they shouldn’t be serving alcohol.  But something’s strange.  isn’t that quotation mark in the wrong place? nope.  They got it right.  The quoted part is the only one he actually said.  Do you get what’s going on here?  spec  is using tricks of print to make it seem like he said they should be serving alcohol, but really, that’s not part of the quote.  He could have said anything.  All we know is that he said “but if they can’t control them”.  After that, he could have said “they should try harder to do so”, or any old thing.  What’s the matter? can’t get an actual quote?  Looking back at your notes “oh crap, I only have a partial quote, I guess I’ll have to make up what he said”.  Or maybe he said some variation which means the same thing, and you wanted it to fit the (terrible) grammar of your sentence?  well in that case, you’re still wrong. That’s what [brackets] are for.  This guy clearly doesn’t know english.

UPDATE:

ahahahahha, apparently this guy is british

specsucks recieves EXCLUSIVE tip about drug deals on campus

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , on October 26, 2012 by specsucks

Luckily our crime section is 10x better then the specs, because we report actual crimes instead of just copying what the police say after it happened.  we do the investigation rather then just being dumb shills for the system.
So we today got our first tip for the specsucks crime section.  An anonymous informant has sent in  a leak tip about illegal actions on campus.  He (or she) tipped us off that there are drug deals going on here on campus on the very ground you are standing on, behind mudd building.  Our tipster said there were at least three individuals involved and that at least two of them were definitely not from campus because they had to look at a campus map.  This is a perfect example of how specsucks is better then spec.  Where is the spec article about this?  oh yeah they dont have one because this is EXCLUSIVE specsucks news.  so much for “reporting” spec you are more lame then a pack of dogs.  where is your crime reporters any way you havent written about crime for like a week arent you trying to keep the city safe so you are just incompitent.  what’s taking you so long, spec?  still writing your article? lol.  we write articles like 100 times faster then you you are so slow it is hilarious.

Spec hiring british people

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , on October 25, 2012 by specsucks

okay hey so all you readers who are loving my blog that is good.  We are the proudest blog on the web we are #1 internet blog and most prestigious on campus or off.

but what about spec why are they so dumb?  well I do not know if I know then i would not have this blog[1].  But spec is dumb but did you know that they also have british people who are not american?  well that sounds to me worse then jobs shipping overSEAS because they are not just sending jobs but instead these people from britan just come in and are treated the same.  Well maybe you should take into account if you are an AMERICAN CITIZEN for wroking at spec.  any way they are supposed to be writing stuff in ENGLISH but the british people write it weird they don’t even do it right so this is not racist i am just saying a fact that we are better at english then they are it is not their fault they just grew up in a country where everyone talks wrong.  so why should we trust them any way. maybe i just fell asleep in history class and english class because i do not remember how we went from rebelling against england to some people think they are our friends.  so for example they killed our men and women and children so how can we forgive them for that?  we didnt even try to invade them they were sending troops HERE to try to take over, so maybe we should have an eye for an eye.  so i would not trust people who tried to hurt us in the past.  so anyway spec why do you have british people do these jobs when there are perfectly capable americans who could do them.  maybe that is why spec sucks.   That is my thesis of this blog post. British people cant even box.

[1] actually i probably would so i could tell people why it is bad but that is not the point i was making a rhetorical question

What’s the matter spec? Too bad at crosswords?

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , on October 22, 2012 by specsucks

Hey spec you guys suck at crosswords.  Cant even solve my puzzle which I can.  here’s a hint:  it’s harder then those stupid peabrain crosswords your used to.  I guess that makes me the #23 best crossword solver on campus.