Archive for December, 2013

Admins join cause

Posted in Uncategorized on December 12, 2013 by specsucks

As you can see there was a friendly protest outside today

admins

The cause marches onward! How many admins are secret vampires?

 

u cant always get what u want spec

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , on December 11, 2013 by specsucks

you may have heard that a new power is rising. but what about the losers? sometimes ppl shoot for the stars and the fall breaks them. tht is BAD for mental health.

but dum spec only tells you the WINNERS, well specsucks tells you the LOSERS, too because we are commited to bringing TRUTH. so here are documents obtained by specsucks. the list of all teh spectsters for turkeyshoot 2014.

https://anonfiles.com/file/c99a33dee46b2c49c61b0aaad737f66f
here is what these top secret leak tip documents from anonymous darknet that are not a spec destroying virus so you should download them to reveal truth.

I. they don’t trust dan grist-O to run the opinion section. what is going on there? is it possibly because he is hotheaded? possibly because he wouldnt know a good submission if it had dickslapped him with a raging inferiority boner? specsucks will examine this more. until then bring back lanbo dum spec (PS I am not the cloaked mask)

II.instead of getting artsy fartsy editor like she wanted more, emma finder is stuck b@bbysitting grist-O. and all so david “the unforgiven” salazar can continue his reign of terror in the arts sexxxxion.

II. tears 4 jill kumnngi you can come to specsucks if you want haha jk we are too prestige

III. wow here is a shocker they have different copy editers for print n specturm but actually it is kind of suprising to lear n that they copyedit either

IIII. despite being on specs dum magazine “the eye” for a long time, suze myers didn’t get to run it

V for vendatta. sports is too concussioned to actualy a winner, so they took both munib and eli. that is a like a safety or a field goal lol

So now you know that some have been broken by the fall trying to climb the lader of success. which of the spited now seek refuge in the shaodws to become new members of specsucks(other than jill ok fine you can come too)? for who does the bell toll.  IT TOLLS FOR THEE SPEC!!!

a new power rises

Posted in Uncategorized on December 8, 2013 by specsucks
blood has been spilled this night. before midnite they stopped deliberating the hour of the wolves. abbi abraham and stefen loud emerge from the ruins of the turkey shots. This specsucks knows. we have already perforemd our secret blood magic ritual so that these two would be elected by deliberations to be editor and manager. That is ok We bathed in the blood of spect turkeys and performed our ritual:
666 is the number of the beast
Abraham went to the mountain to sacrifice his son
He was silent and not loud tempted by satan
the 138th managing board bears dark omens
1+3+8=12

12/1=12 12/3=4 12/8=1
1+12=13 4+3=7 12+1=13
(two thirteens already)
13+7+13=33
however we must make corrections for the asymmetry, so we calculate the symmetrized version
13+7+31=69
Which is half of 138 so to compensate we double 33 to get
66
which is the lazy man’s number of the beast which is fitting for spec
Beware 138 marks your doom
That is what we chanted into the flames. We foresaw never that 3lau would come to campus this time we have only 1 lau. Our chosen emerged. Soon the spec will fall, that also we have seen in the flames.

Dear Pete:

Posted in Uncategorized with tags on December 7, 2013 by specsucks

Ok  I can see that you are learning that spec sucks but may be you should have been more vocal in your indictment because let’s face it the spec is probably more concussed than any of your players. Not only that but your players will go on to work in fiance with they’re Columbia degrees to do our great school of Columbia proud with their alumni connections. What will the dum specscums do? Lol I don’t know. Write more dum articles about the football team to deflect from the fact that they suck more probably.

 

But I think when we here our coach talk may be we should here more about how the spec sucks. Like I do not care about football. I will never care about football. All I care about is bringing down the dum spec. Actually I do not know why I am even writing this letter may be somebody in spec will read it. May be Prezbo will read it. Actually that is unlikely, I mean I doubt anybody reads spec, but of course that doesn’t mean prezbo can’t read specsucks, most prestigious truthblog on campus, but he probably doesn’t read that either. All he reads are alumni donor emails telling him about how the spec sucks. In fact I think he might’ve sent Samy Roth and email the other day telling him to lay off the football team that got published by accident. It doesn’t matter.

 

The point is, Pete, if you choose to speak about how the spec sucks, we will listen. But if I hear one more dam thing about the football team I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD I WILL SPAM PREZBO’S INBOX WITH PICTURES OF YOUR FACE UNTIL HE FIRES YOU.

 

The Author is a Columbia College Senior majoring in Logic. He is the president of the Mickey Mouse Club.